9 Unusual Symptoms Linked to Rheumatoid Arthritis

 RA inflammation affects more than joints. The signs and symptoms of RA and conditions related to it may be felt all over the body, including in the ears, eyes, skin, lungs, and heart. Below is a description of 9 unusual symptoms that may be related to your rheumatoid arthritis.

Rheumatoid Arthritis Overview Video 

Rheumatoid arthritis is an autoimmune disease that causes painful swelling, stiffness, and deformities of the joints. Watch: Rheumatoid Arthritis Overview Video

1. Hearing problems

Researchers have found that hearing loss and tinnitus (constant ringing, buzzing, or whistling in the ears) can be linked to rheumatoid arthritis. Hearing problems typically show up in older people who have had rheumatoid arthritis for many years.

Experts suggest many ways RA may contribute to hearing problems:

• Rheumatoid arthritis inflammation may damage the tiny joints in the ear.1
• A rheumatoid nodule can develop inside the ear.1
• Drugs that reduce RA symptoms, including aspirin and other non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDs)2 and hydroxychloroquine3, may occasionally bring on tinnitus and/or hearing loss.
• Other disease processes may affect the auditory nerves or cochlear hair cells in the ear that are necessary for hearing.1

Some hearing problems are treatable—for example, stopping the use of NSAIDs may reverse symptoms—while others may be permanent. Even when changes to hearing are permanent, steps may be taken to stop or slow down future hearing loss.

Infographic:
Rheumatoid Arthritis
(larger view)

2. Snoring

Research suggests a significant connection between rheumatoid arthritis and sleep apnea4,5, which causes breathing to repeatedly stop and start during sleep. Symptoms include loud snoring and interruptions in breathing and/or gasping for breath while sleeping.

Sleep apnea can also cause headaches and contribute to chronic fatigue because the body takes in less oxygen at night.

Sleep apnea can be diagnosed and treated. Treatment typically includes using a continuous positive airway pressure (CPAP) machine or another treatment device to increase oxygen intake while sleeping.

3. Skin rash

When RA inflammation affects the blood vessels (Rheumatoid Vasculitis / Vasculitis), it can cause a variety of problems, including skin rashes. These rashes may appear as clusters of dark red or purple bumps, hives, or irregularly shaped raised pink patches on the skin. On darker skin, changes in skin color may be less noticeable.

Rashes related to vasculitis can occur anywhere but are most common on the lower legs. Sometimes these rashes are itchy, painful, or burning.

In addition, biologics medications used to treat RA increase the risk of rashes and other skin problems6, such as skin infections.

If you have a persistent rash that has lasted for more than 2 weeks, is painful, or looks infected, it’s advisable to contact your physician. Medical treatment is recommended for any rash that is persistent, severe, or accompanies symptoms of vasculitis in other areas of the body, such as the lungs, heart, kidneys, or eyes.

4. Trouble breathing, chronic cough, or chest pains

The lungs are commonly affected by rheumatoid arthritis, especially if the RA is long-standing and has not been well-managed.

Shortness of breath accompanied by a chronic cough, fatigue, and/or weakness may be a sign of scarring caused by chronic inflammation of the lungs. Shortness of breath accompanied by fever and/or chest pain when breathing may be a sign of fluid build-up around the lungs (pleural effusion). Both lung scarring and pleural effusion can be serious conditions, and medical attention is recommended.

5. Sudden, temporary numbness in the fingers or toes

Rheumatoid arthritis increases the risk for Raynaud Syndrome, also known as Raynaud Phenomenon or Raynaud disease. This condition causes one or more fingers or toes to lose blood circulation. The affected area will feel numb and appear paler, white, or blueish. There is typically a distinct border between this area and normal-colored tissue.

Raynaud Syndrome can be triggered by cold exposure, emotions, and certain medications.7 An episode may last minutes or hours. A warm compress, bath, or shower may encourage blood flow. If symptoms do not resolve then medical intervention may be necessary to prevent tissue damage.

6. Gum disease

Rheumatoid arthritis is associated with gum inflammation (gingivitis) and gum disease (periodontitis).8,9 Both of these conditions are linked to worsening RA symptoms10 and can lead to gum damage and tooth loss.

Regular dental checkups and good oral hygiene at home may help improve oral health as well as ease rheumatoid arthritis symptoms, such as joint tenderness and swelling.11,12,13

7. Increased fat-to-lean mass ratio

People who have RA tend to have a higher fat-to-lean mass ratio than people who do not have RA.14,15 This difference tends to hold true even for people whose weights are within normal range. Experts are not sure why.

Strengthening exercises can help counteract the loss of muscle. If applicable, losing excess weight may decrease rheumatoid arthritis disease activity and therefore reduce symptoms.16 The combination of building muscles and losing excess weight will support joint health and may reduce RA symptoms.

8. Red eyes

While nearly everyone experiences temporarily irritated, red eyes occasionally, eye redness that is recurring, persistent, and/or severe may be a sign of a medical condition related to RA. Eye conditions may be temporary or life-long and typically cause other symptoms, such as eye pain, sensitivity to light, watering, or irritation.

Signs and symptoms of eye problems, including any changes in vision, should be immediately reported to a health care practitioner.

9. Numbness or tingling

A damaged or pinched nerve can cause numbness and tingling in the hands, feet, or other areas of the body. Rheumatoid arthritis may contribute to nerve injury in a few ways:

• Swollen joint tissues cause a nerve to be pinched (for example, carpal tunnel syndrome can result from swollen joints in the wrist)
• Vasculitis related to RA affects blood flow and causes nerve damage
• Certain RA medications may also cause side effects of numbness and tingling sensations

While not necessarily painful, it’s best to report sensations of numbness and tingling to a physician. Addressing the cause may help prevent nerve problems from becoming worse or chronic.

New and unusual symptoms are not always related to rheumatoid arthritis. Contact your doctor to identify the possible cause of unfamiliar symptoms and discuss treatment strategies.

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4 Reasons Scientists Say Exercise Is Great for Rheumatoid Arthritis

 The recommendation to get regular exercise if you have rheumatoid arthritis (RA) is backed up by plenty of scientific research. Experts say there are at least 4 ways exercise may help ease the signs and symptoms of RA.

Rheumatoid Arthritis Overview Video 

Rheumatoid arthritis is an autoimmune disease that causes painful swelling, stiffness, and deformities of the joints. Watch Rheumatoid Arthritis Overview Video

1. Exercise reduces inflammation

Regular exercise tends to lower inflammation levels in the body. Inflammation is measured using blood tests that check for inflammatory markers, such as C-reactive protein (CRP) and erythrocyte sedimentation rate (ESR). Test results for these markers tend to be high during an RA flare and low when RA is well controlled. Studies show that exercise helps lower inflammatory markers.1-5

Exercise may affect RA inflammation levels in a few ways2:

• Exercise promotes anti-inflammatory responses in the body. Exercise causes muscle cells in the body to release chemicals called anti-inflammatory cytokines. Cytokines are tiny protein molecules that act as messengers among cells and tell the immune system what to do.
• Exercise suppresses pro-inflammatory responses in the body. Inflammation is caused by an over-active immune system. Exercise can help tamp-down immune system activity.
• Exercise helps reduce excess fat tissue, which promotes inflammation. Fat tissue can release substances that promote inflammation, such as certain hormones and pro-inflammatory cytokines.

Some experts suspect that exercise can reduce fat tissue’s pro-inflammatory effects even if you don’t lose weight.6 How exercise influences inflammation and RA disease activity continues to be researched.

Lowering inflammation levels in the body can ease RA disease activity as well as reduce the signs and symptoms of other diseases, such as diabetes and heart disease.

See An Anti-Inflammatory Diet for Arthritis

2. Exercise helps build back lost muscle

As RA develops, the body loses muscle tissue and strength. This loss is noticeable at every stage of the disease—at diagnosis, when RA is active, and even when RA is in remission.7 Body weight may remain stable or even increase,8 suggesting that while muscle tissue decreases, fat tissue increases.

Adding exercise to a treatment plan can:

• Build muscle tissue. While muscle tissue accounts for about 45% of body mass in healthy people, it typically accounts for less body mass in people with rheumatoid arthritis.4 Exercise helps increase muscle mass.
• Improve joint function. Muscles move our joints. Exercise to build muscle tissue can improve how well your joints work (joint function).
• Protect joints. Muscles support joints. Building muscle helps protect joints from damage and injury.

Strength exercises may involve equipment, such as weights or resistance bands. Exercises that use body weight, such as squats and certain yoga poses, can also build muscle strength.9

See Tai Chi and Yoga for Arthritis

3. Exercise lowers the risk of heart disease

People with rheumatoid arthritis are 48% more likely to develop heart disease than the general population.10 RA inflammation is thought to damage the heart and blood vessels.

Exercise reduces the risk of heart disease by:

• Lowering inflammation that can damage the heart and blood vessels
• Burning excess fat, which may contribute to heart disease

No matter what, exercise is a great way to fight heart disease—whether RA has been diagnosed or not.

4. Exercise eases symptoms of fatigue and depression

People with chronic autoimmune diseases, such as rheumatoid arthritis, are more likely to feel depressed and fatigued. Exercise can help reduce both depression11-15 and fatigue16,17 in people who have chronic diseases.

Research suggests there are a few possible reasons why exercise helps. Exercising:

• Releases chemicals in the body, such as endorphins and dopamine, which can help improve your mood and reduce sleepiness
• Reduces body-wide inflammation, which is linked to depression and fatigue
• Gives you a sense of accomplishment and control over RA symptoms

While depression and fatigue may not completely go away with exercise, they may decrease and become less noticeable.

See Treating Depression and Chronic Pain

People with other forms of autoimmune arthritis, such as psoriatic arthritis and ankylosing spondylitis, can also reap big benefits from regular exercise.

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Equal Eats Ambassador and 10% off allergen cards!

 I was recently asked to test out the new website for an exciting new product, coming from our favourite Canadian Kyle Dine, he has created Equal Eats dietary allergen cards. Kyle has allergies himself so he gets it and understands the challenges we all face in the day to day. If you haven’t come across Kyle yet in the allergy world, check out his website, particularly if you have children. Visit https://www.kyledine.com/

Equal Eats has just launched in the UK and I am so proud to announce that I am their first ever UK Ambassador, helping them raise awareness for these cool little cards and best practise when eating out with allergies.

Equal Eats Dietary Allergen Cards – Use code WHATALLERGY for 10% off

Here are 15 benefits that I have come up with to buying an Equal Eats Allergen Dietary Card, all the reasons why I think these are such a great idea:

1. Helps communicate – You can easily communicate your allergies to staff. Particularly if you have more than one allergy, it can get lost on translation. This way staff can take your card to the kitchen
2. Avoid confusion – How many times do waiting staff return with the gluten free or vegan menu when you mention your nut allergy. I don’t know why this happens so much but these little cards should help avoid confusion.
3. So simple – They are written in simple, concise and strong language so servers and chefs can understand what’s required and how much care to take.
4. Customised – Tailor them to your needs, whether you have one allergy, multiple allergies, intolerances, coealic disease or other dietary needs, there is a card for you.
5. Affordable – For the cost of a few cups of coffee you can have peace of mind that the card can help you bridge language barriers, loud restaurants, etc. and keep you safe. It’s another piece of armour to stay safe with your allergies.
6. Shyness – I know lots of people don’t like speaking up about their allergies and get embarrassed, so you can discreetly pass this card to staff to read and hopefully it will make things a little easier for you.
7. Translations – They are customisable to 50 languages and these have been verified and checked by native speakers in those countries so you can travel safe with the knowledge that your allergies will be communicated
8. Reviews – These cards are popular. They have over 150 amazing reviews and mine is one of them. Anything that makes eating out with allergies easier gets my vote.
9. Digital cards – You can get digital cards to have on your phone so it’s with you at all times
10. Printable – You can print these at home so if you lose a card you have a backup.
11. Smart – these cards are smart and stylish and have been carefully designed so you can use them with pride.
12. Accessories – You can also get sticky notes, card sleeves, card holders and more accessories coming on line soon.
13. Gift cards – Give the gift of peace of mind and added safety by offering these as a gift to your allergic friend.
14. Peace of mind – I do lots of things to help with my anxiety, like always carry my adrenaline, wearing a medical bracelet, calling restaurants ahead to discuss allergies, etc. This is just one more thing in your arsenal of helping you feel more in control of a frightening health condition.
15. Chefs like them – Chefs who have been asked about these cards say they really help. Better than having information on a phone that a customer may not want to part with or verbal messages of hand written notes that can be mis read or mis heard and mis understood.

Visit equaleats.uk today and get 10% off with my promo code WHATALLERGY to get 10% off.

Many of the cards are already discounted so you could get a real bargain.

Personally I can’t wait to try these cards out next time I eat out. I’d love to know, do you carry allergen cards with you when you eat out? How do you communicate your allergies to staff? I’d love to hear your views. And if you’re a chef, how would you rather diners communicated their allergies to you? Would you welcome these allergen cards?

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Are allergen free menu choices shrinking?

 Since lockdown ended and we can all start to go out to restaurants to eat again it became evident that choices for free from foods had drastically reduced. But why is that?

Why have our allergen free choices reduced?

It’s understandable why when you start to think about it.

• Shortages of ingredients due to the current war
• Increased costs due to Brexit
• Less availability of free from items for lots of reason, business go out of business, reduce their product lines, produce less stock
• Smaller staff teams as businesses are cutting costs
• Stricter processes due to allergen regulations
• People are scared about allergen law suits and mistakes so avoid the issue instead
• Restrictions brought in during covid for safety remain and make things harder and more complex
• Companies are quite rightly scaling back to recoup costs after a tough few years
• Smaller menus are easier to work with

There are probably more reasons too, and I guess we need to be patient, be visible, keep asking for safe options and places that can help will start to reincorporate safe choices for those with a limited diet, for whatever reason.

For now we need to be aware that are limited choices have reduced menus as companies seem reluctant to prioritise allergic diners in favour or recouping losses made. But the allergic diner could be an income stream, a firm fan and regular customer! By ignoring this market you could be missing out!

Choices have reduced for allergic diners

I don’t know about any of you, but from my own small adventures eating out again after lockdown, I’ve noticed a marked reduction in choice and confidence in allergen free options. A few things I’ve observed:

• Less or no free from options
• More focus on vegan and gluten free meals (not suitable for dairy, egg or fish allergic people as laws for vegan food do not require totally free from food, just the intention to do the best they can)
• Fewer options created that are easily free from
• Smaller menus, meaning less choice
• Poor processes meaning staff can’t check even if they want to
• More ‘may contain’ blanket statements that aren’t welcoming to allergic diners e.g. “Our kitchen contains allergens and we cannot guarantee your safety.” Guys, we know this. We know it is on our shoulders to take a risk, but this goes two ways. This kind of statement makes us feel like you won’t take any care at all and that if anything goes wrong you will wipe your hands and say it wasn’t your fault. This kind of statement breeds contempt and a less caring and careful attitude in staff too. Be intentional, be respectful and help us!

Statements like this make us feel a little safer…

An example of a positive and inclusive allergen statement

An example of a poor eating out experience

I recently visited Bill’s in Bracknell with friends one Friday evening. I’ve had good experiences at Bill’s and we chose it because of that. I checked the website and looked at the allergen menu and contacted them before going and was assured they would be able to cater for me. However on the night, there was only one thing suitable, the steak – always the MOST expensive option on the menu. There was NO safe carb option as the chips were not safe due to potential cross contamination. They did not have any other safe potato sides and the rice contained grains. That’s pretty poor. I did manage to get some broccoli to go with it… but as you’ll see it’s a paltry portion of broc. I’d have been a bit disappointed if I’d paid a the side of greens at £3.75! Thankfully they didn’t charge me extra.

The only other thing on the menu suitable was a black coffee! There was a Coconut chai latte that sounded lovely, but it had really poor labelling on it and no ingredients listed on the packaging so staff couldn’t advise me whether it was safe. I accept that with allergies to dairy, wheat, soya and all nuts, this is maybe difficult for a restaurant, but I’ve definitely had more choice at Bill’s before lockdown.

Not all Bill’s restaurants are the same

Visiting another Bill’s, in St Alban’s for breakfast just weeks before I had a totally different experience. I was able to enjoy a pretty good breakfast with bacon, eggs, gluten free sausages and sour dough toast.

So what’s going on Bill’s? Where is the lovely green thai curry you used to do? Why so few choices for those with food sensitives?

It looks like Bill’s, instead of having an allergen menu, have chosen to offer vegan options, which do not have to be free from allergens such as fish, milk, egg etc. Great for vegans but possibly not safe for people with allergies. Read, “Is vegan food safe for people with food allergies”.

I do however like the little allergy flags they put on the allergen free meals, a nice touch and lets me know I have the right meal.

What can restaurants do to include those with allergies?

So what can we do to feel safe and included when eating out? And what can restaurants and cafes do to address this issue?

There are loads of things that can be done and lots of companies offering advice and consultancy. If you can’t afford to get professional advice, there are still simple ideas.

• Offer things like jacket potatoes and simple rice for those with allergies
• Keep labels for bought in products and make sure you know what’s in the products you serve.
• Start making a note of all the allergen bookings you get. What is in demand in your area? What are people asking for? Can you cater for them?
• Have dressing on the side so salads are accessible to all
• Have an allergen menu available, not just verbal information.
• Ask everyone if they have allergies when you take the food order, that way you normalise it help to remove the stigma that we are being awkward.
• Have an inclusive allergen statement, not an unwelcoming one that is basically covering your arse and implying we are taking all the risks and you’ll take no responsibility at all. We hate seeing statements that say, “We cannot guarantee an allergen free meal as our kitchen has allergens.”

There are so many things restaurants can do. If you would like advice speak to Hazel Gowland, Jacqui McPeak and Caroline Benjamin, who provide advice, guidance and training in food allergen processes.

There are always safe places to eat out with allergies

It’s not all doom and gloom though, there are still loads of places that will be able to cater for allergic diners and I’ve had some amazing meals out recently. But for every great experience there have been times when it’s been really hard to find anything safe to eat and others where it’s been difficult for staff to help due to poor labelling and processes.

Here are a few of the good places that I’d recommend:

• Locanda Locatelli restaurant review
• No 1 Aldwych – 10/10 for allergen save dining
• The English Indian (mobile fish and chip van)
• Pizza Express
• Loads of local cafes including Muddy Boots at Rowans and The Potting Shed near Jersey Farm in St Albans, interestingly both at garden centres!

There are probably many more and I’ll be exploring more eating out places over the coming months so watch this space! For more ideas visit Allergy Companions, the Trip Advisor for people with allergies

Free from choice at supermarkets has also become limited

Anyone else noticed their favourite free from snacks and go to staples are hard to find or just disappeared from supermarkets? I’m having to source things direct from the manufacturers because the free from choices in supermarkets near me have seriously reduced. I think this goes for all products, including the main stream not allergen free foods, but it hits the allergy consumer harder. We already pay more for our safe products, because it costs more to produce freefrom foods. We understand the extra costs but buying direct adds on postage and makes it harder to plan.

It’s important to support the independent brands we love by buying from Holland & Barrett, other health food shops and also direct from them; if you have the storage, buy in bulk to avoid postage, or share with an allergic friend. I wonder how many of our favourite brands will struggle to compete in a market which is pushing them to the side-lines.

It’s all about gluten free and vegan choice

Have you noticed that there is LOADS of choice for gluten free (with may contain warnings) and vegan diners (also with may contain warnings).

I understand why restaurants are choosing to follow these markets, arguably they are larger and in the case of vegans, they are not in danger of anaphylaxis or illness if they eat any animal products.

Whereas those with life threatening allergies could end up in hospital and coeliacs are made very unwell, vegans just won’t know if a meal is cross contaminated or even contains an allergen. Is it a bid to avoid potential law suits for allergen process negligence? I do get it, but it’s frustrating as it feels like we are being discriminated against and excluded from many places.

I also wonder how many of those with coeliac disease are finding they get ‘glutened’ more often, a phrase used for when they eat gluten by mistake and suffer the consequences. This is also very worrying as many coeliacs do not have any outward symptoms despite damage being done inside their small intestine. If undetected and prolonged this can lead to serious complications and permanent damage.

What has your allergen eating out experience been like?

I’d love to hear from you all. How has your experience changed since Covid? Is it easier? harder? The same as before? And I’d love to hear from any restaurants owners of chefs who have any ideas of how to make eating safe and inclusive for allergic diners.

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How to Make Your Own Allergy-Friendly Easter Chocolates and Desserts

 It’s fun to give your child fun sweets and gifts for Easter. But many store-bought Easter treats contain many of the most common food allergens – such as egg, milk, peanuts, tree nuts, soy, sesame, wheat, and gluten.

You can still give them delicious homemade candies and desserts. Kids With Food Allergies (KFA) has several recipes and tips to make this a fun and allergy-friendly Easter!

Easter Candies

Allergy-Friendly Chocolate Easter Bunnies – The chocolate bunny is often the centerpiece of the Easter basket. With chocolate free of your child’s allergens and a mold, you can make your own safe chocolate bunny. Or use smaller molds to make all sorts of fun Easter-themed chocolates.

You can make an assortment of allergy-friendly chocolate candies with Easter and spring-themed candy molds.

Milk-Free, Soy-Free White Chocolate – If your child prefers white chocolate or you want some variety, try this homemade white chocolate that you can also use in your Easter candy molds.

Peanut-Free, Milk-Free Buckeye Candy – Traditional buckeyes are peanut butter balls partly dipped in chocolate. But this version can be customized according to your child’s allergies using their favorite seed or nut butter. For an Easter version, divide the dough balls into small egg shapes. After dipping each candy into the chocolate and chilling, wrap in colored foil.

Watch on YouTube

RELATED CONTENT: Allergy-Friendly Easter Candy Guide

Easter Desserts

Easter Cupcakes – These fun, easy-to-make cupcakes only involve four steps. And they can be made without the most common food allergens. Decorate them with Easter- or spring-themed toppers, or top with some of your homemade molded chocolates.

Top your Easter cupcakes with themed toppers from a craft supply store or top them with your homemade molded chocolates.

Pastel Zebra Cake – For a colorful treat, use safe food dye to bake a cake using the zebra effect. Use your favorite cake mix or an allergy-friendly recipe like Kathy P’s Wacky Cake. Wrap individual servings in cling wrap.

Using safe food coloring, customize your zebra cake with pastels or your child's favorite colors.

Carrot Cake With “Cream Cheese” Icing – Nothing is more appropriate at Easter than a carrot cake! Make your own allergy-friendly cupcakes with milk-free “cream cheese” icing.

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A Post-Cancer Letter To Pre-Cancer Me

 Dear Pre-Cancer Me…

Oh, hey girl. You’re looking great. Cute shoes. 

...But you may want to sit down. I’ve got a little bomb to drop on you. 

This won’t make sense right now, but hear me out…you’re gonna get cancer.

I know, right? Crazy. Stage three. Ovarian. Lots of chemo and surgery ahead. Say “sayonara” to your uterus, spleen, ovaries, hair, and breasts. And super sorry, but…four years after your diagnosis, you’ll still be dealing with one pesky area in your liver. 

Here’s the thing: hindsight is easier than foresight. 

Post-Cancer Me has a whole different perspective on things. This makes sense because when you’re in the midst of a stressful and chaotic experience, it’s nearly impossible to retain a neutral, logical outlook. 

And just to give you a heads up…

You’re gonna need to endure twenty-four chemo sessions. 

A hysterectomy. A splenectomy. A double mastectomy. 

An infection from the mastectomy, and a subsequent five-night stay at the hospital for round-the-clock antibiotics. 

A ruptured tissue expander in your left breast, then a quick surgery to replace it. 

A collapsed breast pocket, and a subsequent breast reconstruction surgery. 

Two liver ablations to kill a liver tumor. 

Then a one-time dose of radiation to kill it for the THIRD time. 

Hopefully, that’s it. Only time will tell.

But look - among all that trauma and chaos, you’ll also gain a new sense of strength. A sense of purpose. 

Clarity. 

You’ll publish a memoir, and write another one. You’ll fall in love with weightlifting. You’ll finally go to see a therapist and start prioritizing your mental health. You’ll learn more about yourself in those four years than you have in your entire life.

So darling, Pre-Cancer Me, here are some tidbits that I’d like you to keep in mind as you trudge through the sludge of fighting cancer.

1) The bad days are temporary.

You know that expression “The days are long but the years are short”? That totally applies here. On a day-to-day basis, your brain is entrenched in chemo, doctor appointments, nausea, fatigue, anxiety, sadness, hair loss, insomnia, and a fresh aversion to nearly all foods. (Bye-bye to coffee!) The hours slog by at a glacial pace and you can’t even fathom a time when it’ll all be finished.

But eventually, it will.

At some point, your loving mom will say, “One day you’ll look back, and this will all be in the past.” And you’ll say something snippy because you’re tired and scared and queasy. 

But Mom is always right. 

There are good days in your future - and lots of them. 

There are moments of absolute joy, moments where your heart is so full, that you cry and cry and cry and can’t believe you still have the ability to feel totally fulfilled. 

So, try and remember this, especially during that time when you’re crying in the living room watching “Real Housewives Of Orange County” and wondering if you will ever feel joy again. You will.

2) Having said that, it’s OK to feel sad and awful. 

Look, Post-Cancer Me is a fan of retaining a positive demeanor through dark times, but you should never judge yourself for feeling sadness, resentment, fury, envy, frustration, and utter despair. You HAVE to allow yourself to feel that way. Your instinct will be to drown out that noise, or to brush past that - because sitting in those feelings is certainly no picnic. But the only way to truly process and move past those feelings, darling Pre-Cancer Me, is to sit your tush in those dark emotions and lean into them. Cry. Keep crying. Then cry some more. Break the remote control. (Then hurry to Target and buy a new one before anyone notices.) Do whatever you gotta do to spend time in those dark moments...then release them. 

I recommend sobbing, shattering a dish, then cuddling with cats. 

Just know that it’s OK to feel exactly how you do.

3) Fear will have a very powerful grip on you. 

Prior to your “Big C Diagnosis,” the only fear you’d really known was the normal stuff: spiders, fire, clutter, and the giant impending earthquake in L.A. that we all collectively pretend won’t happen. Then your world got tossed upside down and suddenly everything was scary. 

Worrying became a huge component of daily life. You worry whether you’ll pull through. Whether the side effects from treatment are normal. Whether they’ll last forever. Whether you’ll get a recurrence.

Whether you’ll have to fight cancer for the rest of your life. 

But guess what? This fear will morph into hope.

 Hope is just as powerful as fear. 

As you continue to progress through each week and each milestone during treatment, little slivers of hope peek through, like tiny rays of sunshine. The more room you create for hope, the less room you hold for fear. Soon, you’ll start living in a place of hope, and life will feel so much better than you ever imagined.

4) Your mental health is just as important as your physical health.

Movie quote alert! You know that part of “The Matrix” where Morpheus says, “The body cannot live without the mind”? Pure wisdom.

You are going to be vastly unprepared for how much this journey will affect your mental health, prior to which you never sought therapy or dedicated much attention to your mental well-being. 

That’s gonna change.

Once your physical strength slips away from chemo and surgeries, your mental health gets worn down. And when you don’t have your physical OR mental health, you’ve got nothing. So please pay extra close attention to your psychological welfare during this time. Be kind to yourself. As mentioned before, the bad days are temporary. And don’t neglect the well-being of that three-pound Jell-O mass in your skull.

5) Try to find peace among the chaos. 

Yeah, it’s easier said than done. But if you wait for everything to be perfect before you’re happy, you’ll be waiting a long time. I know, I know, how can you be happy when you’re sick and bald and tumor-y and constantly on the edge of panic attacks? Well, by making the best of things, and being grateful for the things you DO have. Your family. An incredible team of the best doctors and nurses in the world. An army of people behind you, both in real life and online. A body that can handle the onslaught of trauma. A roof over your head. Snuggly cats. And the knowledge that you WILL get through this.

So, Pre-Cancer Me, you’re in for a tough ride. But not an impossible one. You’ll come out of this a stronger, healthier, happier human. Just strap in, get some wigs, and show that cancer who’s boss.

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